I think the combination of Christmas parties and New Year’s Eve parties is almost like a “resolve the relationship” trigger. If there’s another man in the picture, she’s going to try to get to him on those special events. There’s alcohol and opportunity… and all those Emotional Affairs turn into Physical ones.This isn't surprising. Most married women significantly overestimate their sexual appeal to men because they fail to recognize that it stems, in part, from the fact that they hold a monopoly. They don't realize their charms simply aren't what they once were when they actually had to compete with other women on the open market.
I’ve had some super salvaging of relationships in December. The husbands that have won have won big, but not everyone has won.
In January, it seems the December failures have all the shit hit the fan. In those cases wives are all leaving my guys that have been running the MAP faithfully.
But… the husbands are all starting to crack up laughing.
Let me explain that.
I’m 5 for 5 with the following pattern of guys who have been running the MAP and have had wives leave them in January.
At some point in 2012 the husband figured out all was not well in the marriage and sought out MMSL. They all started running the MAP and self-improving. They all had varying degrees of positive response from the wives. They started digging into the problems and sorting them out. But for one reason or another, the wife wasn’t interested in staying, and when the ultimatums came down… actually more often than not the ultimatum was triggered by the wife rather than the husband… she left the marriage.
So let’s be clear here – ALL of the husbands were very much trying to save the marriage. I’m talking 5 for 5 husbands have endlessly emailed me or been on the forum, actively trying to save the marriage and fix things with their wife. But despite best efforts, each one have been dumped and left.
I am 5 for 5 for having those husbands get hit on by other women as soon as the wife is out of the picture. As in attractive other women. As in younger attractive women. As in… “Athol, I don’t understand why I was trying to save things with X anymore. I know I’m going to miss her, but being completely honest, I don’t think I want her back anymore.”
The advantage that the married woman has, in addition to her monopoly, is the Love Goggles, that flattering Photoshop filter that causes a man to see his wife as an amalgam of what she was, what she is, and her Platonic Form. Of course, walking out on a man not only throws away a woman's sexual monopoly, it tends to put a crack or two in the goggles as well.
What Athol's inadvertent experiment indicates is that the theory of Game is empirically sound and is a powerful predictive model of human behavior. It also shows that we, as men and women, often not only get what we deserve, we get what we demanded.